"You Are!"

 … Joseph, whose wife had recently died, sat on his bed crying desperately. The agonizing dream was once again a painful reminder of the lost of his lifetime partner, and friend. ~ He cry's ... saying, “Mary, you left too soon … You left too soon”. His son, Henry, having heard his father’s weeping, walks into his bedroom. Setting aside their profound differences … Henry’s compassion overpowers their decades of hostility to each other.

The father, a Judge … the son, a Chicago city Lawyer … brought together only due to their absolute love of the same woman. To one, his wife … the other, his mother.

Swiftly … in lawyer-like manner, Henry attempts to distract Joseph. “Hey, who’s the best lawyer you’ve ever seen?” He asks. “Come on! Mines Robert Graham. I work for him. He just … he doesn’t lose. Now you … Uh” … It only takes Joseph but a couple moments, and then he responds, “Mr. Shaw. My first job after Law School.”

Then, as surprising to the audience … is Henry, as he hears Joseph … his father, then states Mr. Shaw’s full name. “Henry Shaw”, he says. To which Henry ... with an 'Oh my' look replies, “Henry?”. For the very first time in his life, Henry realizes the man for whom he was named. A man, for whom his father greatly admired!

Henry, most frequently was the author of his own trauma. And, his father, Judge, most definitely produced a strong arm of strictness, when it concerned Henry. Judge would say, that due to Henry’s truancy, his son required this type of discipline. Joseph remarked, “You were headed down the wrong path. I did what I thought was right”. ~~ Yet, even with their severe history, Henry, from deep within his core, was able to manufacture some immediate and required compassion.

And though, as the story continues … and their hostility likewise … the viewer is brought to the nonpareil scene. Father and son, on a beautiful Indiana morning … casting from their small fishing boat. Likely a lake that they had often fished together.

Henry reaches down and picks up an old familiar treat, to which Joseph says, “Give me some of those.” Henry grabs a handful of ‘Bit-O-Honey’ and places them into his father’s hand. “You little gremlins inhaled these”. Dad coughs a bit, and Henry asks, “You want some water”. Joseph replies, “No”. And then Joseph asks, “Remember what you’d say if you thought I had one on me?” In unison they respond, “Where’s my ‘Bit-O-Honey’ old man?” They chuckle … “Worked every time”, grins Henry.

Joseph, with a slight sigh, looks away and contemplates … then says perhaps two of the most powerful words. They are words of affirmation. Words … well, I’ve watched this scene more than fifty times … and the response … always … always chokes me up. Even a couple times with moments of uncontrollable tears. Why? Why does it still hurt?

My father died nearly fourteen years ago. Yet, our last meeting … the very last time that I was ever beside my own father … was more than twenty years from today … then, January of 2004 ... six and one half years before Richard Ray died. Six and one half years before he died ... was the last time we ever sat beside one another. And today, June of 2024 ... the pain ... Why does that pain still reside so deep within my chest? And though not as severe as Joseph and Henry … Rick and yes, Rick, had been estranged. Thankfully … only weeks before his death, while attempting to bring some reconciliation … like Joseph and Henry, we concluded via email with some positive correspondence. And then … like a miracle moment … after more than nine months without a single chat … my father called on the very morning that he died. I would not receive that message for another three days … as our family was vacationing on the Oregon coast. A message, that I am grateful to have received … to have recorded.

So … Henry, waiting for his father’s reply … looks into his father’s face. His ball-cap rest upon his head. Joseph, a fishing hat, upon his. As Joseph says, “You are!” Henry, chewing on another fabulous piece of ‘Bit-O-Honey’ says, “I am?” Joseph, “Yeah”. Henry, “What?” Joseph, likewise chewing on his ‘Bit-O-Honey’ says, “The question you asked me about … the best lawyer and all.” Henry, still unsure of his father’s point … stares with a slight quizzical look, as Joseph pauses … slowly looks down. And repeats, “You are!” … Joseph continues, “You picked a person you worked with”. Joseph with another slight pause, looks down and then into Henry’s eyes, and says, “I choose you!”

Henry … with immediate moisture in his eyes, obviously fighting back the tears, glances down into the boat. The seconds seem like minutes. Henry, still with his eyes lowered. Joseph … dad, still chewing with both a slight smile and nod. Pause … more chit chat … Then Henry reaches for the fishing rod and … before making one last cast, says, “Five bucks I catch a sun fish before you”. Without a response … Joseph … Judge … Dad … slowly bows his head. A half a minute goes by … a ‘Bit-O-Honey’ wrapper falls to the bottom of the fishing boat. Henry … seeing dad slightly slumped over, quietly says, “Dad … … Dad”. And I say, “Wow!”

How I long for … how so many children … they long to hear those words … “You are!” Please … I urge you. Please … don’t let another day go by. Before you tell your children … that they are. You may never get another chance. Oh … how I would love to have … just one more chance … one time … to hear my dad say … “Rick, you are!”

 

Judge, a 2014 movie starring Robert Downey Jr as Henry, and Robert Duvall, as Joseph/Judge. Some definite language that is not appropriate for children. The story ... very powerful! 

 

 a favorite ... Mark Schultz ... Lord 'Before You Call Me Home' ...

 

And ... that last call ... the morning that he died ...